Classic Post: Female Ratings System
Originally published 12-2005
Before I actually discuss this, I first would like to declare that I think ‘rating systems’ based solely on the appearance of the girl are worthless, and are essentially nothing more than superficial, chauvinistic devices employed by guys who are insecure about their small dicks. I am of course referring to the ‘1-10 scale’, which seems to be the most common euphemism among poorly endowed, over-egoed, assholes everywhere.
That, and it just sounds stupid. “We were partying with this chick, she was a seven.” Numbers are not adjectives, genius.
Furthermore, the ‘1-10′ scale is inherently flawed at the outset. By this scale, a ‘10′ equals perfection. How can any woman be a ‘10′? And with that in mind, why aren’t you still with her if she is perfect? Have you ever noticed that nobody describes the person they’re currently dating/fucking in this manner? You know why that is? It’s because men don’t want their lowered standards to be known to all, so it is only employed when speaking about someone in the past tense.
Example: If Fred were to tell Joe that he’s banging an ‘eight‘, and upon seeing this girl, Joe decided that this ‘eight’ is actually a ‘five’, Fred will look like a bitch in the eyes of his friends for talking this chick up to his buddies. And the fact is, Fred probably knows that she’s only a ‘five’, but if he told his friends that the girl he’s with is only a ‘five’, he’d lose man-points with them. So it is only effective after the fact.
The truth is, generally, a man will take home almost any woman given the opportunity. This is not to say a man will not try to sleep with the hottest chick he can. Men are elitists. But they’re also realists, and there’s no such thing as bad pussy, as long as it’s easy pussy.
With all this being said, a ratings system is somewhat necessary, as long as it is defined and it is expressed in the proper context.
How it applies:
A woman getting a 1, 2, 3 or a 4 is being judged on her appearance/attitude. Essentially her desirability from a purely aesthetic standpoint.
The criteria is as follows:
1 – Basically, a receptacle. A girl you’ve banged (hopefully not more than once) or would bang, but wouldn’t necessarily care to have anyone know about it. You will make little effort to get with a ‘1′.
2 – Average to slightly above average in appearance, but not exceptional in any way. You wouldn’t mind banging her. She isn’t your first choice, but if the opportunity presented itself, you wouldn’t turn it down. A good analogy would be when a football coach elects to kick a field goal on 4th down. The kick is successful, but a defensive penalty allows a first down if the penalty is accepted. The correct decision is usually to keep the field goal. Some effort is acceptable in trying to score with her.
3 – Definitely above average. This girl has no visible flaws. She may not be drop dead gorgeous, but she’s definitely good enough. You don’t care who sees that she is with you, or knows you’re fucking her. The egotistical types will actually show off a ‘3′. A ‘3′ is worth a fair amount of effort.
4- This is the girl that everyone is after. Everything about her is smoking hot. There isn’t much more to say than that. The chance to take this girl home is definitely worth any reasonable amount of effort.
Rating Personality:
(If you think a girl’s personality has nothing to do with her rating then you are a dipshit.)
The personality ratings for girls are as follows:
.0 – This girl’s personality is completely devoid of any redeeming qualities. She may have absolutely no personality at all. I wouldn’t go out of my way to listen to what she has to say, but I wouldn’t intentionally disrespect her either.
.25 – Generally, this is the quiet chick who may be shy or whathaveyou and just generally doesn’t say much. She possesses no traits that make her unpleasant to be around, but she is not all that noticeable either.
.50 – A pretty cool chica. She is tolerant of my antics, and will be amused by a lot the things I do and say. A good chick to hang out with, and is worth getting to know better.
.75 – This girl’s personality is excellent. She is fun, funny, easy to talk to, liked by many, etc. Girlfriend Material.
.99 – This rating is reserved for the most awesome of ladies. She is funny, nice, giving… basically the kind of chick I might intentionally ditch my friends for. These personality types are rare. It is required that you know a girl for at least 24 months before assigning such a rating.
(Note about “.99’s”: The default rating for such a girl is ‘.75′, until sufficient time has passed and no flaws are found. Then, a panel of not less than six respected womanizers are to convene and determine whether she deserves such an upgrade to this elite status. This is to take place in hearings that would likely resemble a Supreme Court Justice’s Confirmation.)
(-.25) – A chick with this rating is tolerable only if she is good in bed. Your friends tolerate her only because they might want to bang her when you are done with her.
(-.50) – This is not a girl you hang out with unless you are guaranteed some quality ass. This girl is obnoxious (in an unredeeming way), loud, irritating and tends to voice her opinion on every fucking subject that comes up in conversation.
(-.75) – This girl flat out sucks. She better be able to throat your dong with expert precision and furthermore be willing to do it at a moment’s notice to make up for her abysmal personality.
(-.99) – Pretty much the same as above, but you are not banging her. Chances are that if you are in the presence of a woman whose personality is this bad, it’s because one of your friends is fucking her, in which case, sometimes you need to take one for the team. But, you are entitled to deliver a swift kick to the seed-bag if your buddy continues to subject you to hanging out with his socially inept cum-dumpster.
How it applies:
Now you combine the two ratings. If for example your woman is a solid ‘3′ in appearance with a cool personality, you’d call her a ‘3.5′.
If the same girl has a shitty personality, you’d label her a “3-.5″. So phonetically, you would say, “she is a three negative point five zero”.
Sounds retarded doesn’t it? That’s the point. If your dating someone that worthless maybe you shouldn’t be telling people about her.
And just to clarify, a ‘3-.50′ is not a ‘2.5′. A woman’s looks will NEVER make her personality seem better to you.
Reader Comments
You’ve seriously thought too much about this. Nerd.